Man, am I screwed up!

The holidays are coming up.  The holidays start with my birthday, which is in 12 days.  Then, four days later is Thanksgiving, and, of course, Christmas isn’t far behind.  

Tonight, Christy and I were talking about the holidays and where we would spend them.  My brother and sister-in-law will be spending Christmas in North Carolina with her family.  My mom will have to be in Virginia a few days before Christmas so she may just stay there a few extra days and then go to North Carolina for Christmas too.  I figured I’d just stay here in Dallas and spend Christmas with friends and with my dad.  Then I had a WONderful idea: I could spend Christmas alone.  

I started playing it out in my mind.  Picture this:  fire in the fireplace, cup of hot chocolate, bucketful of chocolately goodness (thanks to Noel,)  How the Grinch Stole Christmas on the TV, Christmas carols on the radio, me in flannel pajamas snuggled up in a blanket with my dog.  

Doesn’t that sound fantabulous?  Oy vey!! Yes, it’s true that I might spend the evening crying my eyes out, but there are times when wallowing in self-pity sounds like so much FUN!  Seriously, I almost want to do it just so I can say I spent the holidays alone and survived.  I like being a martyr sometimes.  I’m sure I would feel differently about it if I actually didn’t have anyone to spend the holidays with, but if it just so happened that this particular holiday season we just couldn’t work it out to get together, fine.  I’ve survived worse.  I’m a big girl.  Sometimes you just have to pull up your big girl panties and get over it.  To be able to tell such a tale of survival sounds like such glory!  

Reminds me of a song I know:


Yeah, I might feel defeated
I might hang my head
I might be barely breathing
But I’m not dead

Tomorrow’s another day
And I’m thirsty anyway
So bring on the rain

I’m not gonna let it get me down
I’m not gonna cry
And I’m not gonna lose any sleep tonight

'Cause tomorrow’s another day
And I am not afraid
So bring on the rain


Is there something wrong with me?  Inappropriate comments will be deleted.